The First Month for Emilia

The countdown continues to June 14, 2015, Emilia Caledonia Rhea Avanzino's first birthday...

What were we doing this time last year?  We were expecting a baby any day now, of course.  The days leading up your birth were harrowing to say the least, but as soon as you yelled your big "HEY!" to the world, we had yet to know the true meaning of "life turned upside down."  That first month - Baby Boot Camp, indeed - changed your mom and me.  You made us into parents.

It's common knowledge that new parents will be in for sleepless nights, piles of diapers, constant drool and spit-up wiping, and general personal havoc while they adjust to focus on the new life in their lives. Luckily, your mom had planned ahead (Oh Baby!) so that the trailer, all of your necessities, many of your possible wishes, and even our prospective schedules were in place before we even left for the hospital.  We really had it dialed up and were going to start right!  Then came a few unknowns.

Unknown #1: You would quickly became all there was.  I had no idea how centered on myself I was until you became totally reliant on me and your mom. All that mattered each day was whether you had pooped or peed and how frequently, how long you were feeding, and how long you could nap and where would be best for that?  Did that work?  How about this!  OOOOO this works well... oops not anymore.  To physically and emotionally center awareness around you is something I couldn't explain or fathom before you arrived, and still can't.

Unknown #2: Clocks cease to matter. Days literally become one series of events (most of them listed above) that seems to have no stop or pattern.  Following the move of a single grunting and helpless being becomes a required obsession, constantly trying to establish a routine, prognosticating about who you will become as a result of our decisions, then relaxing about that last part, deftly adjusting and adapting everything for you based on what just worked, falling asleep when possible and waking up on the cusp of REM sleep. Absolutely the most delirious I have ever been... drunk on baby.  It was the worst best craziest peaceful endless month of my existence.

If I could relive that month, I would again and again.  We lost our minds in you.  But that's love.